There are those times in life where the sh*t hits the fan and we are placed in the midst of a chaotic mess, forced to look at our own sh*t and clean it up. Right now is one of those times for me. I am getting tired of the constant sh*t I keep throwing at the fan. Today, I read this article and was given a little nugget of clarity and encouragement.
“Any vacancy that is a result of any change in your life introduces possibility.”
These simple words allowed me to think deeply about what “change” and “possibility” can really create. To start, the word “any” is not conditional, it’s an open-ended option. Just like the unconditional love we all seek. If we quantify it by certain standards or attempt to strictly define it, we remove the unconditional quality that embraces the nature of human existence which ultimately leads to unhappiness.
When we (more specifically speaking, I) define set expectations and limitations on what change we/I want to manifest, we/I automatically remove the vacancy to become available in the first place. We as humans fall victim to the temptation of control. Our personal “NO VACANCY” sign is lit when we are not at our full capacity.
In this act of staying “safe” in our conditioned minds, we remove what possibility can truly bring by placing conditions on what change ‘should’ look like based on a very narrow mindset. This relates to how we so frequently place limitations on our love, thinking we ourselves or another human needs to be different in order to be lovable. We pick out the flaws and imperfect details of what we “need” them or us to do in order to be fulfilling. Whether for another person or ourselves, we limit our love like we limit our potential.
This quote is a friendly reminder that ANY sort of change, undefined by labels on the spectrum between “good” and “bad”, will create some sort of vacancy as we drop or add people, responsibilities, habits, passions, goals to our daily lives. This vacancy is the source of our possibility to expand and mold.
In support of this idea of being at peace in the ambiguous vacant space, I have been imprinting this into mantra into my being, not just my head but even more, my heart. “I didn’t come this far, to only come this far.” It is the hint I personally need in order to move beyond being stuck in strategizing how to stay safe. I already have put so much effort to escape, heal, and transform my demons. But that sh*t is not a chocolate covered cake walk.
When our internal vacancy light is on, we are being asked to STAY with ourselves in the present…stay with it all: the emotions, experiences, awareness, and struggle. Rather than searching for a different space to reside. STAY. We must accept that there is never a guarantee that the experience will be luxurious. Sometimes in the environments we most expect comfort and leisure, we discover hardship and disarray.
What I’m finally learning to trust and lean towards is the truth that the places of upmost possibility to become who I want to be result from space inherently created from risk and change. From the courage to STAY and discover the amenities life has to offer. I don’t want to stop on my adventure because I didn’t come this far to only come this far!